I can take a hint!

What do you call that unsettled feeling in the pit of your stomach, the very center of your core, and that spot deep in your heart? Discomfort? Uncertainty? A lack of peace? Why is it that sometimes we don't even acknowledge that feeling?

Apparently, I felt that sensation ...because now it is gone! [Thanks God!]

I told you about the interview with Footprints Recruiting and described how I felt like a number, solely filling a quota. Almost immediately after I had the interview, I received a Facebook message from a friend-of-a-friend. The same one who initially recommended Footprints Recruiting, actually. This girl had asked me way earlier in the summer if I would like to teach young children at a Montessori school in Seoul, South Korea.

I completely ignored the hint.

When I think of my future as a teacher I think of small, intimate classes of adult students. We are joyfully engaged in meaningful and educational conversations. I, of course, am always prepared and learn excellent classroom management techniques for the pert or snide student. I teach during the day with one or two evening classes. My teaching career continues like this for two or three years before I return to the United States for my M.A. in TESOL or I move to a Spanish-speaking country to solidify my grasp on Spanish. Notice that nowhere in that idealistic vision of teaching are youngsters mentioned.

Apparently, God has different ideas.

When this friend-of-a-friend [someday I'll tell you her name] asked again after the Footprints interview if I was interested in the Montessori teaching position, I paused. Why exactly did I reject the idea? Oh yeah, because it didn't fit in with MY teaching dreams. There weren't any other good reasons. In fact, there are a lot of good reasons to apply for the job: I love children and that age group is actually pretty perfect for me; the Montessori method is actually rather intriguing and seems to fit my teaching style for youngsters; the school is located in the capital city which is where I definitely wanted to be; and it is a Christian school. The age of the students are the only thing that doesn't fit with my "ideal teaching scenario."

I can take a hint.

My desire in life is to be in the center of God's plan for me. His Will, not mine. Which means that I don't get to complain, "But Lord, everything else is perfect! I just thought that I would teach adults!" I'm pretty sure He would respond, "Beloved, that time will come. Right now I need you to be humble and care for My children. Teach them about Me - in English. This is part of My perfect plan for you." "Yes, Lord."

So I sent my resume.

And they responded back exactly as I wished Footprints Recruiting had. They asked about me. They asked me who I was and who God has made me to be. When I received their questionnaire I felt that sensation completely disappear. I am not a number to them or part of a quota. This is the sort of school I want to work for and this is the school for which I hope I get to work.

So for all of you who are graciously lifting me up in prayer, thank you! My current request is that God would clearly show me (and the head of the Montessori school) if this is the school where He wants me.